How I came to God

Since the day my father left, when I was six years old, I believed it was my fault he left. As I got into my teens, I hated everything and everybody because of this anger in me. This led me to a road of darkness. Now I’m not going to get into what I did or what I seen or was a part of but suffuses to say it was very dark and I am very ashamed and sorry for the things I did to others and to my self, so Long story short…from my age of 10 to my late thirties; I have seen and done things shameful and unspeakable. Spending all of my preteen to teenage life on the streets I hurt people for my gain and for fun, and along with drugs and alcohol; I did whatever else I could to numb my conscience to what I was doing.

It was not till my early forties that I started to feel that something was wrong with my life. But I still did not know what it was I was looking for; or better yet, who was looking for me. In my early forties, after I had destroyed my marriage and most of my life, I was still falling deeper and deeper in that darkness and by this point I had lost everything. As I look back now, I realize God was searching for me. There was a young Christian man I worked with back in my mid twenties, named Dave Quigley, who used to tell me about God and I used to make fun of him all the time.

In my mid-forties after everything in my life was gone, when in the strangest way, unknown to me, God had a plan, I met a beautiful Christian girl, Muriel. At first, I didn’t care that she was a Christian but it started me thinking about my life. I later found out that she knew Dave Quigley and his family very well. Knowing that she was a Christian, I had many questions about God and why he left me like this in my life.

Questions like:

How can men have written the bible, knowing man is the biggest liar in the world?

And for all we know, the bible started with ten pages and man added what he wanted through the years.

How can God let terrible things happen to people?

Why would God even want people like me in his kingdom?

What would God want in return because nothing is free in this world?

Muriel answered most of my questions, but I still didn’t understand; so Muriel would always tell me I had to read for myself and God would answer the questions I was asking. At this point of my life, I was financially ruined and lost my business, so the only thing left was to join the army…they will take anyone!

So I took my Bible and enlisted.

I started my journey at boot camp. I started reading my bible in my down time. At first, I got a few strange looks from the other recruits but nothing that was too hard to deal with. After about a few weeks of reading, I decided to start going to the School Chapel on Sundays. I don’t think I realized at the time, but God must have been working hard on me, because I started reading more and started to feel terrible about the things I had done in my past. I realised that the bible was not written by men but was inspired by God. I was bringing my Bible with me out to the field and anywhere else outside of the shacks.

After boot camp was over, I got sent to CFB Kingston where I now had more time to read. In Kingston, I met Padre Bruce McKay. He was an ex infanteer who God saved at a young age, then trained as an officer to be a Padre. We talked a lot about God and many bible topics.

Between 2008 and 2009, I started studying more and sought out a few other Padres for more insight to God’s word. With the help of my wife, I dove right in, head first. By the end of 2009, I was sent on my 3’s (military training). I was still reading and learning my Bible when I was put into a class with an Atheist that was very vocal in his hate towards God’s word. He had a bible in class on his desk and would read from it, from time to time, and pick at the verses he read and make fun of it. This was painful for me and hurt my heart so much because I was new in learning about God’s word. I was saddened because there was not much I could do to defend the Bible as I didn’t know enough to refute him. I could only tell him I was not a good person before God found me.

After my 3’s in 2010 and much more reading, I realized that, because of my background and my sinful heart, I needed to be saved. I needed to repent and ask the Lord to forgive me for all my sins (and there was a lot). I kept struggling and struggling with the fact that God would save me for free. I kept thinking there was something I had to do. I then realized through Jesus’s words that it wasn’t my works or deeds that would save me. It was only through faith that I could be saved. One day, in mid-July, on my way to work in my Bronco, I was thinking of God’s words about salvation. Then and only then, after a long struggle, did I believe that the Lord Jesus Christ died on the cross for ME, to free me and forgive me.

Things then began to look different to me and I was able to defend my faith with God’s word. In 2011, I got married, and we met a wonderful teacher, Padre Greg Girard. He taught me so much stuff about Bible doctrine and how to study efficiently and helped me to stand firm in God’s word. From this point on, I got into Bible study groups and prayer warrior meetings.

I now stand before you as a witness of all that God has done for my soul and in obedience to Christ Jesus Yeshua, my saviour’s command, I will be baptized as I belong to Him.

Blessings to you all,

Jimmy

This verse brought me great comfort when I was in boot camp and going through physical training at 46 years old. It amazed me how God would help me when I prayed to him.

Isaiah 40:28-31

28 Have you not known? Have you not heard?

The Lord is the everlasting God,

the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He does not faint or grow weary;

his understanding is unsearchable.

29 He gives power to the faint,

and to him who has no might he increases strength.

30 Even youths shall faint and be weary,

and young men shall fall exhausted;

31 but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;

they shall mount up with wings like eagles;

they shall run and not be weary;

they shall walk and not faint.